"People only see what is visible, measurable. God sees into the heart. He not only forgives our failures, He sees successes where no one else does - not even ourselves. Only God can give us credit for the angry words we did not speak, the temptations we resisted, the patience and gentleness little noticed and long forgotten by those around us. Just being human gives us value in His eyes, and trying to live with integrity makes us successful before Him. God redeems us from the sense and fear of failure because He sees us as no human eyes can see us. Some religions teach that God sees so clearly that He knows all our shameful thoughts and nasty secrets. I prefer to believe that God sees us so clearly that He knows better than anyone else our wounds and sorrows, the scars on our hearts from having wanted to do more and do better, and being told by the world that we never would." ~Rabbi Harold Kushner

25 May 2010

...there are dreams that cannot be, and there are storms we cannot weather...

Is this true?  I suppose that I believe that about certain dreams...but are there really storms that we cannot weather?  I feel like sometimes I am in the midst of one of those storms...waiting to be tossed into the whale...or perhaps I'm already there.  And then I remember these words from Elder Maxwell:  "Patient endurance permits us to cling to our faith in the Lord and our faith in His timing when we are being tossed about by the surf of circumstance. Even when a seeming undertow grasps us, somehow, in the tumbling, we are being carried forward, though battered and bruised."

And so I have to cling to the belief that all storms can be weathered, though perhaps not in this life...  "Adversity and heartbreak happen to good people; such is the fruit of a fallen world." Bruce D Porter


How exactly to we get through that heartbreak?  I've been taught that the atonement can pull me through...but how exactly does the atonement work for heartbreak and sadness?  How do I take my frustrations, my hurt, my pain, my feelings of failure caused by my shortcomings...how do I take those and give them to the Savior, while still trying to deal with the events and situations that cause them?  Obviously I can apply this to liking girls, but it goes so far beyond that.  I mean, the liking girls thing doesn't seem to be going away any time soon...but it would be nice to have somewhere to send all my frustration and sorrow that is a result of it...to be able to wrap it up in a nice little package and just hand it over to the Savior.  I need to let it go...because there is always going to be more, "such is the fruit of a fallen world" and I don't want to be hanging onto all this baggage from the past.  It's much to heavy and cumbersome to be carrying around all the time.

So if anyone out there has an answer for me as to how you actually take those feelings and turn them over to the Savior, I'd really love to hear it.

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