I hope

I am literally sick to my stomach over all the hurt and anger that has arisen on both sides of the issue in the last week.  It is cliche and perhaps even naive to wonder why we can't all just get along.  


Two opposing viewpoints...opposing viewpoints that will never reconcile themselves to one another...much the same way I feel that I may never be reconciled with myself...not in this world anyway. 


There are those that may not believe that my attraction towards women is real...that perhaps it is a way of making myself feel better because I'm a single 31 year old LDS woman...or there are those who perhaps think I'm a complete idiot for continuing to participate in a religion that would deny me the choice of being with the person to whom I am attracted...at least not without disciplinary action.  A religion where people judge me unrighteously and negatively despite the fact that I am NOT acting upon my feelings and in spite of counsel from the prophets and apostles that ALL people...ALL of Heavenly Father's children...be treated with love and compassion and kindness.


To anyone that would make a judgement or an assumption based on this one part of who I am...to you I say...I'm doing my best.  I really am.  And perhaps today my best is not as good as it was yesterday...and maybe tomorrow it won't even be as good as it is today...but maybe it will be even better.  I'm doing my best to live the gospel.  To be a good and kind person.  To honor my temple covenants.  To treat all of Father's children with love without sacrificing what I know to be right.


I do not think that life is going to get easier...I think it is only going to get more difficult and I hope and pray that I am able to continue to grow and move forward with charity and compassion...with understanding and steadfastness.